I caught a glimpse of myself from behind through a glass darkly, and the voice from the Magic Mirror said, "have another donut - just kidding". (Note to self, wash the Magic Mirror's mouth out with soap). In this time of the Feastof the First Harvest, it looks like my ship has already come in. And attached itself to my stern, so to speak. As I looked around the Lammas Circle, as we feasted post-rit on Cakes (with jam and icing) and Ale (hearty and stout, like many of us), I was drawn to ponder the phenomenon that may be more than just Craft Culture.
Truly, though, in this case, the food we eat in circle and in the mundane world may be out of this world delish, but the song remains the same, and the shape retains the blame for scrumptious delicacies consumed both in and out of sacred space, and that, to finish the phrase, is "of the world" indeed.
There has been much media too-doo and doo-doo lately about the lardening and largening of the North American Behind. We are a continent of Jolly Happy Rosey Cheeked Dimple Butted Souls, swimming in the fat of the land, buttered up by advertisers who new and improve themselves into a frenzy by adding extra fats and salt to make their processed repasts as palatable as possible. When did food become a commodity - a product? When did Agri-culture become Agribusiness? When did my backside get so supersized? Yes, I did want fries with that - consider it a momentary lapse of judgment, with wide ranging consequences. Key word - wide. As in Wide Load.
I was preparing myself a bit of lunch the other day, a box of Craft Dinner, and for some reason unbenownst to the Gods, decided to read the nutritional information panel on the side of the box (recycled paper, btw). Ah, I smirked in self-righteousness - only 250 calories, if made with skim milk (oxymoron) and margarine (If I want to eat petroleum byproducts, I'll go chew on a tire swing).
My smirk changed to one of self- frighteousness when i read that those 250 calories (okay, add real milk and butter - lets make it a generous 350) were Per Portion - and that there were 4 portions in the box. All my life, ever since I was a wee baby witchlet learning how to stir a cauldron at my mother's knee, I thought a box of Craft Dinner was a single serving. Who knew? Here was half my caloric intake for the day. Do the Math. Do the Magick. Time to buy a new robe one size up. Wonder if I can let out the seams on a few things?
Why are so many Pagans so very Portly? Shouldn't we all be running around in the Wildewood, singing, dancing, making music and love, all in Her Presence, naked in our Rites? Whaddya mean - no one sees you nekkid? (ah, the road to Perdition). Oh - you can't run for more than a city block without invoking the element of Air to please return to your gasping lungs. It is good that we take up space, hold our ground, grow our power, increase our presence on the spiritual and cultural scene and can't get pushed around. But we're doing it literally, not energetically or figuratively. Which means we're not healthy on the inside, or the outside.
I celebrate with gusto that our glorious pagan women distain the admonitions of Madison Avenue and Vogue Magazine and all their ilk. Quite the herd of ilk, really - I am always amazed when I visit the local Ye Olde Booke and Magazine Emporium trying to find the most recent copy of Wand Wavers Weekly that there are so many magazines and periodicals devoted to telling me how to look, think, and act (usually in order to trap a man. Sweetings, I've got me one powerfull love attractor spell - thanks anyways. Only out of sage when I want to be).
While we may be stylish, we don't strive to be a size 0 for the mere approval of our culture, our peers, our partners or our Gods. We like to be normal, healthy, rounded, curvaceous, sexy, Goddess like in our various diverse forms of glorious womenhood. But let's admit it - some of us have taken the Venus of Willendorf a little too seriously as a role model. How does that phrase go - size 0 is the new size 2, and size 8 is the new size 14. Now that we have achieved size 0 will designers be creating clothes in negative sizes? Don't turn sideways, Ms. Lohan, you'll be invisible except for the zipper in the side of your dress.
Speaking of sages, if some of our men had to leap the Balefire, we'd be dialing 911 as we sang that olde-tyme seasonal carol - "Chett's nuts roasting on an open fire". For many of our men, it seems that their get up and go, got up and went. Not that I'm looking for 6 pack abs (not that I'd complain), but we are talking some serious girth issues here. When I wrap my arms around you, darlin, I'd like my hands to meet. We have a few more Dionysus types than Adonis types. On the other hand, some of the slender young men are so slender that I fear they may blow away in a stiff breeze, or break from a hearty embrace. Sorry, dear, I didn't mean to snap your spine. Blessed Beltane. Have a backbrace.
Yes, there is so much more of us to love - but we may be loving ourselves into heart attacks, strokes, diabetes (a scourge (not the good kind) in the pagan community), And when it becomes a health issue - it dishonours She Who Made Us. When my physical movement is impeded by my physical bulk - there's an issue. When I drop my wand, and look hopefully at the Coven Maiden to offer to bend Alllll the way doowwwnn to pick it up for me ... I need to try to touch the toes of my pointy boots just a little more often. Time to pull up my red and white striped socks and do some pagan calesthentics (which, contrary to popular opinion, is not bending the elbow to reach the mouth with loaded fork or beer stein).
Can anyone name any famous Pagan Athletes? We've got scholars, and writers and academics, and philosphers, and a few actor-types, but where is the Pagan Poster Child for Physical Activity? What would a Pagan Olympics look like (remember - they were ours first - and the opening ceremonies of the Athens Olympics certainly reminded me of the Games' pagan past). What events would be on the roster? I'm open to suggestions. Here's a few off the point of my hat ....
- Remote Control Relay - infrared targets shot by various team members as the remote control is tossed from lazyboy recliner to lazyboy recliner?
- Websurfing on the High Seas - given a list of obscure topics, and barred from using Google
- Drumming Marathon - last one still keeping the rhythm wins. (yes, rhythm - often a highly rarified concept at some drumming circles)
- Potluck Sprint - first one to reach the buffet table and load their plate with some of everything wins. (last year's gold medal winner used the soup as gravy to avoid the penalty points of using two plates to get it all)
- Bi-athalon - best left to the imagination.
- Creative tri-athalon - competitors move from zone to zone on foot - and must a) assemble beaded jewelry, b) make soap in the shape of a crescent moon, c) concoct an aromatherapy potion or potpourri, and d) assemble a wearable garment of chain mail.
*Medics will be standing by in case of overexertion, burns, scalds, carpal tunnel flare ups, or angry lovers throwing punches (the greatest peril of the bi-athalon)
But back to business, here. Where is the balance? In pulling away from the societal norms, have we let ourselves go too far? One thing that I have noticed in my Junior Witch Club, is that the concept of energy is becoming harder and harder to teach, explain and work with. The precious little witchlets don't feel it, can't raise it, wouldn't know it if it crept up on hot buttered feet and bit them on their backsides. The level of stamina is stagnant. (but to be fair, I must admit that sometimes, in our Coven Energy Raising, we huff, and we puff, and we knock ourselves out long before the roof blows off the building). More than willing to point my boney old fingers back at myself when I'm pointing them elsewhere.
There is a subtle shift in the magickal community towards the concepts of "prayer and meditation" - which used to be known as grounding and centering, in preparation for some pretty exuberant energy work. That piece seems to be going by the wayside. Three circumnavigations of the circle while chanting and running out of breath is NOT raising energy. We are doing ourselves a disservice - we are choosing to energetically disconnect with life force energy, we are stagnating within our bodies, and increasingly unable (and because of that inability increasingly disinterested) in active physical participation in the world of magick). Magick is becoming a passive act. Energy in, energy out. Garbage in, garbage out. What you see is what you created is what you get.
So, for lunch today, I plan to go out into my garden, and cut some lovely leaf lettuce (whatever the rabbits have left for me), some radishes, a few green onions, a nice ripe juicy sunwarmed tomato, and I think I have a smallish cucumber that I can harvest, and I'm going to toss myself a salad. Its a start. And then, I'll brush my teeth, and pay a visit to my Mirror Mirror on the Wall, toothbrush still in hand.
Until next time, my Witchy Ones - and I warn you now that reduced butter intake makes me just a little testy. Cranky by name, cranky by nature. Hope to see less of you more often in the future.
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